Wouldn’t it be wonderful to accept and be accepted for who we are? Inside and outside? Unconditionally? We start off that way…what happens?
As young children we are accepting of everyone, we expect that everyone will treat us kindly and take everything for granted. Everyone is equal no matter what the color of their skin or the size of their body. We don’t know any difference. There are no learned biases… yet.
As we grow older, that all changes. We take on our parents or peers values and lessons taught. Far too often we learn to hate because people are different or even because they are less fortunate. The color of skin, the size of body, where they live, physical and mental capacity all become the misguided focus of unwanted attention and criticism
. In elementary school we begin to see children (some to a much greater degree than others, and some not at all) begin to display signs of preferential bias toward skin color, size, behavior, looks, physical or mental prowess, lifestyles, etc.
By high school, if one is inclined to be critical of others, it is fully engrained in their personality by this point and they often become very vocal or obvious about these preferences. These are the people, who grow up to be the adults that behave in the same way and end up teaching their children in turn.
Fortunately, there are far more people who are at least willingly to try to see others for what and who they are …inside…and out, and make their preferential decisions based on that. Unfortunately, the ones that do display biases (even though fewer in number) are the ones that make the larger impact. Their words and actions are usually often heard or felt to a greater degree. Their words and actions often cause pain, emotional if not physical.
Now……..All of this brings me to another passion of mine which is music, and karaoke in particular in this blog. So right about now you are saying to yourself, how did she get from acceptance and bias to karaoke?
Ever been to a karaoke bar? If you haven’t, or perhaps visit infrequently, you can’t help but notice something very ’special’ about the karaoke community within it. There are people from all walks of life, all colors and ethnic backgrounds, all sizes and all lifestyles and they are all accepted. Sure you have different levels of ability, but everyone is very accepting of that as well. The regulars of a karaoke community understand that music bridges all those societal stigmas.
Every song, good, not so good or indifferent, gets applause. Smiles are on everyone’s faces. Music induces a ‘good feeling’. ( www.Karaokecraze.com - check out benefits of karaoke) This is not just a thought but actually has a medical reason.
People know they can go to karaoke because they will be accepted by the karaoke community even if they are not always accepted within society.
In my karaoke community, I can count on the fact that every Friday night a very ’special’ group of people will turn up to support the rest of us and ask the same in return. They may not always sing the right words or be able to keep up with the music all the time but their effort and enthusiasm is contagious. And guess who gets the biggest applause? You guessed it!
Occasionally, you will have someone in the audience who says something that is less than kind to someone who is trying their best. These are those people mentioned earlier that obviously have not figured out that whole ‘acceptance’ and ‘tolerance’ thing. ( I can also almost guarantee that their children are the ones that we have to deal with in class for being bullies or critical of others)
A friend of mine, new to karaoke, and very good already, was telling me last week that he had gone to his favorite karaoke venue and when it was announced what he was going to sing, some lady from the crowd hollered out, “Don’t wreck it!”
Even though that tended to put extra pressure on him, he nailed the song perfectly and as he walked back she looked at him with a, “hmmmpff.”
“Geeeesh,” he said to me, “She wasn’t even singing.”
How easy it is to criticize others from the other side of the fence, without knowing circumstances and situations. Or even worse, just because you want to get a laugh or make yourself feel better at someone else’s expense.
I think this is why karaoke has become such a growing success. People not only feel good when they sing, but they know that they will be accepted within their ‘community’. We all want to be accepted within society but know that we often aren’t for whatever reason. What better way to be accepted than by doing something you enjoy, that makes you feel good, with people that enjoy the same thing and will accept you as you are. Wow, now there is a novel idea!
I can honestly say that I am not always thrilled with what I see out there in the big world. How people sometimes treat others without the respect , consideration and/or just being at least tolerant.
On the other hand when I visit my karaoke community, I find that that all seems to disappear, at least in my little world while I am there.
So I have come to the conclusion that we as a society should think about making a couple new years resolutions for 2008. The first is that we should all try to be more accepting and tolerant of other’s differences and the second is that perhaps we should ALL join one of those karaoke communities in order to see how it should be done 
